To get the most interesting encounters, I drive late at night after putting Kobe to bed. After the bars close, in LA, it’s like the Walking Dead. It’ll take a miracle to raise the dead.
 
2 am. The map lights up with all the drunk people getting kicked out of bars. And there’s the occasional stripper who needs a ride home. But that’s when they talk the most. I know most drivers don’t talk to the passengers, but I don’t do this for the money. She spills her guts about the frustrations dealing with all the other jealous strippers. I share my testimony about how I quit my engineering job to become a pastor.
 
I dropped off a group going to a “Friendsgiving.” I hate millennials, like the Babyboomers hated us X-Gens. I can talk about anything with anyone, except millenials, because they’re always buried in their smartphones. They only look up to say, “Can I charge my phone?” Almost always, they’re unaware that I’ve arrived at their destination. “We’re here!” and then they look up. I should just drive around and around the block to rack up the fare until they notice, but I’m a Christian.

He gave me $120 so I wouldn't tell his girlfriend I dropped him off at a motel. I can only guess what he's gonna do there.
 
All the members of this rich family hire her (full-time) to buy presents for each other and their friends. Plus, write the cards. The mom has no idea what she got her daughter! This is the perfect picture of the walking dead. When you’re too busy to spend the money you make, you’re not living anymore.
 
 “You’re him!” I guess pictures of my car have been floating around instagram and facebook – the racecar Lyft. He was showing off to his girlfriend how much he knew about cars, but half the things he said was BS. Instead of contradicting him, I baited him in conversation by saying, “yeah, just put the stuff in the back trunk,” referring to the MR2. He said yup. Then I said, “The MR2 doesn’t have a back trunk. The trunk is under the front hood.” It was a very quiet ride afterwards. LOL! dang it another low rating.
 
Based on 550 rides that I’ve given, I’d say that 80% of the population believe in Karma. I’m so sick of people talking about Karma. It’s just the spiritual law of sin. It’s not Karma, it’s God you fool!
 
Olive switched from being Christian to Muslim for the sake of her future children with her current Muslim boyfriend. She gave me some nonsense story about Ishmael’s well in Mecca. How is that any proof? Too bad I don’t have any short videos on Islam. I told her she was never a Christian if she didn’t believe Jesus is God. She would sacrifice eternity in heaven so her family won’t argue on earth? That’s how dead these people are.
 
Rohan was Indian, so I asked, “Are most Indians Hindu?” We got into a deep discussion on how all religions are the same. I told him the one thing that makes Christianity different. He was actually surprised. He said he’ll go to church and check it out. I should make a pastorjasonanswers video on this since it comes up so often.
 
I was bragging about how much I know about China, since she said she was from the mainland. Then I asked about her siblings. She said she had no siblings. China’s one-child rule. wow, I’m an idiot.
 
He said he was an intellectual with a hyper-brain function. He was bragging about how he had to drink a lot of alcohol just to slow down his brain so he could win a debate with a professor of quantum mechanics. Perfect. I felt comfortable attacking him with my presuppositional apologetics, since he claimed that Hitler was on the right track. not quite the intellectual, I guess. We talked about Lucifer and Original Sin, but I had to drop him off so soon. I should’ve said let’s talk some more. But now he’s just the walking dead, and one day he’ll meet his hero, Hitler. He’s so dead.
 
Thilina was from Sri Lanka, and I ignorantly asked if he was Muslim. He said most of them were Buddhists but he was Catholic. He asked what I was and what the difference was. Lucky for him, I have a video on that. I told him to watch it. I shared the gospel and then dropped him off.
 
It finally happened. I asked Ariel, “If you were to die tomorrow, do you think you would go to heaven?” He grew up as a Seventh Day Adventist, and his dad is a Muslim. Right now, he doesn’t go to church but says he believes in God. Even though I had said “good job” to his morals, he told me, “I don’t know if I’d go to heaven.” Why not I asked. He felt guilty about not going to church. Then I told him about the gospel of grace. When I got to his place, he didn’t want to get out. I knew why. He wanted to meet Jesus. So we prayed together to invite him into his heart. He was so happy. He didn’t want to leave my car. But it was getting awkward. and late.
 
I guess any Christian can raise the dead. Just introduce them to Jesus.
I’m just a driver doing Dead-Lyfts.

It was another thing I never experienced as a pastor. I was going to take care of Kobe, so my wife can just worship God. I just had one goal: listen to the sermon, and I guess a secondary goal was to actually pay attention.
 
It was easy in the beginning. I got this! I was worshipping with the congregation as Kobe danced along. Since Living Way wasn’t so crowded, he didn’t get in other people’s way. But still, it was one eye on worship and one eye on Kobe. and no, I couldn’t close my eyes during prayer. no biggie. Then Kobe sat through the announcements and testimony for 10 minutes. Can Kobe last longer? gosh, I wished the sermon came first. Then there was a short intro and reading of the passage. Then 1 minute into the sermon, Kobe couldn’t sit still. I had to take him out.
 
They had the typical TV and audio right outside the chapel, but the sound sucked. The audio is blaring out of the TV internal speakers, muffled with static. Yes, I could make out what he’s saying, but there’s no pleasant comfort. Churches spend thousands of dollars for the sound system inside the chapel but can’t shell out $50 for an aux speaker from Ebay? it’s freaking ridiculous.
 
I thought I could drop off Kobe at the nursery so I could go back in the chapel. It was a good nursery, and they even sing songs there, but like other nurseries, there’s no sermon feed there. Anyway, every time I got up to leave, Kobe would start crying, especially since he didn’t know anybody there. I couldn’t leave him. There was another TV set right outside the nursery, and the sound was not as horrible there. However, there were parents sitting there chatting away about ice cream shops. And I didn’t want to be that jerk who says, “Can you guys keep it down? I’m trying to listen.”
 
So I went back to the area right outside the chapel. 1/3 of the way into the sermon, it was easy to catch up, since I’ve preached on this passage before, and he was going in order. But half the time I’m chasing Kobe around. Now, Kobe wanted milk. I had to go back in the chapel with Kobe to get my bag. We were in there for a minute, and I was sweating just so Kobe wouldn’t be disruptive.
 
2/3 of the way into the sermon, Kobe decided to go up the stairs. Then for the first time, Kobe started going down all by himself. wow! Now I’m not even listening to the muffled sermon. At the most important part of the sermon, the last 2 minutes, the background music started, and I couldn’t hear a thing. no, nothing wrong with the praise team; it’s the TV speaker sound. I couldn’t even hear how he was bringing it all together.
 
At the end of the day, with lots of effort, I got the main point of the message. But I missed all the nuances, and that special insight or inspiration that sets a good sermon apart from the average ones. It felt like that rushed meal you get when you’re also feeding your kid. I can’t get no [da na na na] satisfaction.
 
But this is the ordeal that many baby-mamas go through every Sunday, getting less than a half portion of the Word. God’s people are loved by community, encouraged by counseling, but changed by the Word. How do we take better care of those who care for babies? They need more feeding, not less, since they’re probably eating for two.